so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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