yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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