Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
