What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
