i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
