I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
you never un-have a 4some
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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