i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
