Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
