You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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