escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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