She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
