Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Randomize
