Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
