If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
