I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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