i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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