Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
