Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
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