bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
