you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
