O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
