i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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