this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
