Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
