brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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