she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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