So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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