my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize
