Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
