There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
