Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
