the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize