exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
