It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
