Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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