My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
