how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
