I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
