what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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