I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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