Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
