talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize