I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
My hand turned me down
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
