I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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