just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
