You really coming over, don't trick.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
