Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I FOUND THE LEGS
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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