let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
