when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
