so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
