Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
